What should I ask the doctor?

Posted on Choice Mom discussion board: "So, my question to all of you is: What did you find out that you wished you knew going in? What do I need to be asking?"

Kathy's response:
I wish I had known to ask all of these things, since each has provided me with pause at some point along the process.
1) Are you open on Saturdays and Sundays for monitoring and procedures (IUI)?
2) Who will be calling me with test results and how is this handled?
3) What sperm banks do you allow? (if ADI)
4) What is the process for ramping up? When do you consider that it is time to notch up the variables?
5) What else do you suggest to support this process? (supplements, aspirin, progesterone, yoga, acupuncture, etc.)
6) Can I exercise? What level of exercise?
7) What foods to avoid?
8) How do you handle holidays?
9) How early could you see me? (for monitoring and IUI)

What else should be on this list?

It Actually Happened

submitted by Jeanne

I am 40 years old and began this journey about 10 months ago (when I was a mere 39!). I'd always half-joked that if I didn't find Mr. Right by the time I was 30, then I'd have a child on my own. Well, 30 came and went, and I changed my deadline a few times. I figured Mr. Right had to be out there somewhere, I could wait.

Before I knew it, 40 loomed on the horizon. Yes, my grandmother had had her last two children (out of 10) at the ages of 44 and 46 - but could I take the chance it would work for me? So, at my annual physical, I mustered the courage to talk to my physician about donor insemination. She was very supportive and immediately referred me to the infertility clinic (the wait to get in could be 10 months to a year). I left feeling very nervous about the whole thing, but figured I'd have one more year to get used to the idea.

Well, only four months later, I had an appointment at the clinic. I wasn't sure I was ready, but was too scared to let the appointment go. Long story short, the process began. And three unmedicated IUI's later, I'm pregnant!

I did have time to go through changing my mind 100 times, coming up with new things to worry about, wondering if I was doing the right thing, and so on. But, now I'm pregnant.

I'm very thankful and happy mostly. But every once in awhile all those old fears creep back. Will I be okay financially? Will the child hate me for doing this without a father? And now there's some new worries. Will this baby be healthy? Will I have a miscarriage? Will I have enough support? What will certain people say when they find out??

The difference now is I seem to have more faith in things just working out somehow. I guess I finally realize the worrying is kind of pointless. Besides, all this worrying isn't good for the baby!!